Unwanted.

Having a different name in college makes me feel a different person. At first, it’s kinda awkwad but you’ll get used to it. I used Rea in elem and highschool but used my second name Camille in College.

Somehow, being Camille makes me more happy than Rea. I’m used to answer to those names but being called Camille is different. Like living in LB. it makes a difference. Despite the news and all the things that had happened in LB, I wish I am staying there right now. Being in LB makes me feel that I’m independent and free. That I don’t have these borders or limitations on how to act since people don’t know me that much. I can act whatever I want. I can be whoever I want to be. Hindi naman sa hindi ako nagiging ako pag nasa Rizal ako pero andun ung fact na kilala nila ako as this so I should act like this.

Being Camille is being free while being Rea is being reckless. Being Camille is being hungry everytime while being Rea is being “buraot”. Being Camille is being a nobody but being Rea is being someone I made int he past. I do not want to forget about being Rea. Being Rea has its perks but I want to be Camille. I just want to live in LB because it feels like home to me. That I belong there. That even though I’m not popular or cool, I can be me.

Oh hell. I’ll just go to sleep. Look how poor I am now in expressing ze thoughts.